May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009

Bituwin - template
Dementee - image

my journey with homework

i see homework running towards me... from all directions. oh! i spotted Miss English, Madam Chinese, Mr Maths among the crowd.

they have been following me around for the past seven years, and they are still haunting me.

i'm defenceless against their attacks. they will always find a chance to shoot questions after questions from their guns, at me. i tried screaming and shouting for help; i tried hiding among all the animes and drama shows i could find, but alas! they are too powerful, for i will be found eventually.

how i wish that someone will block all their attacks from me, and free me from their evil crotches*.

one day, when i was escaping from the trio, i stumbled upon a hard thing.

i looked at it and saw that it was actually a lamp, with some tiny words on it. I took a closer look and read," Ah beng and his magical lamp.."

i looked inside the lamp and saw an instruction manual. i managed to get the paper out of the lamp and opened the folded piece of paper.

it says:

AH BENG'S LAMP

yo! i am ah beng's lamp. as you can see from my name, my boss is an beng, the 大哥 from 铁头帮. anyway, i can grant you all kinds of things you want. just say! and it will come true lah! confirm can work one!
however ah, you have to think carefully before you make any wish hoh, because you only have three wishes, then you anyhow use, then confirm waste diao de wish lah! so must use your brain, think, then wish.
ok? good luck ah! oh yeah, you have to feed me three times a day with oil or wax, if not i will die, then your wishes also si liao, no hope. then you want to make a wish right, just rub me... hard, and i will cum... come out. good luck again!

yours sincerely
AH BENG'S LAMP

--------------------------------END OF MESSAGE------------------------------------

"maybe AH BENG'S LAMP can help me?" i thought.

so, i rub the lamp very hard using a cloth, and i heard a strange sound coming from the lamp. a genie came out of the lamp right after that, panting heavily and sweating like hell.

"ok, i am AH BENG'S LAMP. you read the manual liao right? what wish you want? use your brain, think, then wish hoh. don't waste my bloody time, make it a quick one." said the genie.

"erm, i ... i think..." i answered.

"wa lao eh, quick lah, just now ask you to think why neber think? i don't care liao. i give you one minute to make that wish. after one minute still have no wish.. hehehe~~" the genie gave an evil smirk before continuing, "THAT WISH WILL BE WASTED!!! HAHAHA!!"

"orh, eh eh eh... eh eh eh.... ah! i know! i wish all homework will be gone from me!!" i exclaimed.

"eh, sorry, this one cannot be granted. so, 1 wish gone." the genie replied.

"what the buck?! why cannot?"

"that is the rule mah, you neber read that paper meh? got write that you cannot make a wish on homework, school work, housework, your luck, your health, your wealth, your life and your love. apart from that few, the rest can make a wish. eh, not written there.. anyway, you have one wish left." said the genie.

"how come one wish left? i thought two!" si-bei-bui-shong-the-me exclaimed

"you just just now ask me how come one wish gone mah, then i explained to you about what you can wish, what you cannot wish, so that one considered one wish mah. eh, don't tell me you forgot hoh? anyway, you got no more wish left."

"NIGHTMARE AH!" i screamed.

just then, i woke up and broke into sweat.

"phew, it was just a nightmare."

the next day, when i stepped into the school ground, my right eye started to see lots of little homework demons running towards my direction.

that's when her terrible life starts. T.T



* it is supposed to be clutches, but somehow, the author dream about evil crotches instead of evil clutches, so let's forgive her! Ah men!

以上故事若有雷同，纯粹属于巧合。谢谢！

ah, let's get back to work.

signing off~

11:22 AM ·